Heading out on a first date is an exciting experience. Who knows, this simple encounter could lead to a lifelong partner. While that’s hopefully the case, you also need to remain practical. The flip side of that romantic coin is that this person could turn out to be a total creep.
You might think that you can spot these jerks from a mile away, but most people have a difficult time picking up on the hints that Mr. or Mrs. charming are actually a toxic nightmare. While it’s impossible to weed out everything on a first date, like their financial habits or willingness to do chores, there are a few red flags to be aware of. Here’s what you should watch out for.
Beyond Reasonable Late
Everyone gets caught in traffic now and then, so don’t panic if your date is a little late. However, if their tardiness extends to half an hour with no text about their whereabouts, then consider this the first strike. It shows that they don’t respect your time.
Life in the Fast Lane
If this isn’t a Tinder-type date, then you should know where your boundaries are. Dates that quickly get a little too touchy-feely or bring up sex too fast are an immediate red flag. Give them a chance and let them know you’re not ready to take things so quickly, but get out of there if they persist.
A sex crimes attorney in California warns that anyone should be cautious around these types of individuals. Pushing your sexual boundaries, especially after you’ve asked them to stop, could be a sign of a sexual predator. That might not be the case, but it’s better to be safe than sorry and end the date early.
Part of a first date is opening up to someone new, but there is such a thing as oversharing. Dates that make the conversation too personal too fast are often needy or clingy individuals. More importantly, people who just dump information without letting you share as well are showing that this date is all about them.
First dates are all about getting to know someone new. So, some possibly heated topics like religion or politics might pop up. There’s nothing wrong with that if both of you can have a calm, rational conversation about it, even if you disagree.
However, you should consider it an enormous red flag when your date becomes confrontational. Any good friend, attorney, or police officer would suggest cutting your losses at the first sign of confrontation. If things begin to escalate, you don’t know this person well enough to tell what they might do.
The Job Interview
Your date should be present and in the moment during your time together, but some people are a little too present. You can tell when this is the case by the tone of the conversation. Are they genuinely getting to know you or does this feel more like a job interview than first date?
There’s nothing wrong with asking a lot of questions, especially since you two don’t know each other that well. In fact, some people resort to questions when they’re nervous. Those questions should turn into bits of conversation, though. If it’s one line of questioning after another with no actual discussion in-between, consider it a red flag and move on.